THE SECRETKEEPER'S VAULT

Hi Mario Kart Obsessed Racers, 

You'd think a vault holds valuable things like diamonds, or gold, even stacks of cash (A.K.A dinero). Being a confidante and keeping people's secrets and locking them down on the inside like a vault keeps all your documents such as papers and passports safe is a burden that takes a toll, but when people don't trust you to keep the secrets locked tightly in the vault then the real issues start. People being wary of you to keep all their truths and worries hidden on the inside aren't worth your time yet you still feel like you owe them the hand of trust and will go to the greatest of lengths not to smash it into a billion shards of glass that cut deep on an emotional level. You show them that you can be given the olive branch of trust and they still don't believe that you can keep your mouth shut, then that's not a YOU problem. It's a THEM problem. The key to being a successful initiate of the secret-keeper's vault is to embrace the darkened shadows of silence. I'll stop rambling and give y'all some awe-inspiring advice now. 

Sit back and relax. Grab those fluffy pillows and blankets and get comfy in your favourite pair of loungewear/hoodie/PJ's/T-shirt/Joggers, and grab a huge glass of hot chocolate, and listen loud and crystal clear:

'You have to let all the distrust from other people slide off of you like mud from a mudslide and learn to keep all the secrets that you've stored in your invisible vault under your skin and learn to keep them there under the tightest security better than lock and key like that face recognition or fingerprint protection. People might underestimate you, don't let them show them that you can keep it under wraps and your can keep their words in the strictest confidence. You might have to prove yourself to reach some top secret bar of perfection, forget about  that you don't need it. You have to be the OG and keep your mouth shout right?'

Ooh, that was some heavy hitting advice a huge paragraph written in teh stone right? Nah it's not about the greatness of it. It's about trying to build a fortress of invisibility and keep yourself safe from all the pressure that falls on your shoulders from the people who you care too much about, you have to be a human safe most of the time and learn who your people are that you think can be trustworthy enough to have  your back and keep everything undercover like a super spy. Hey maybe you could be James Bond or some top secret organisation like MIB(Men in Black). They're amazing movies. You have to go through some Dauntless level initiation fo get the keys to the kingdom of being a member of the secret-keeper's vault. You have to forget about all these trust issues you have and get ready to be someone's ride or die and keep their info to yourself. You have to store it in these boxes at the back of your mind like these boxes you put everything you don't wanna chat about and seal them with imaginary tape. 

Okay, I gotta stop rambling now. I'll give y'all some awe-inspiring advice. Sit back and relax, grab those quilted blankets, and those fluffy pillows, slip into your favourite pair of loungewear/PJ's/hoodie's and joggers/T-shirt and jeans, and grab your favourite packet of crisps, and listen loud and crystal clear:

'Sometimes when it gets too much you explode like a grenade. You have to let all that anger go and take a few deep breaths and maybe write it all down on a protected laptop where no one can get in and read everything that's whirling around your brain like all these worries that you hide under the layers of normality just needs to get out off all your insides and just flow into a keyboard and then you can forget about it and move on even if it takes a long time to get over it when people tell your to get over all these messed up anxieties that will never leave you alone and make your chest tight. That's the crazy thing about keeping all the info on the inside it's a cost you have to take into account.'

That was some next level advice. That is a great song from Hobbs and Shaw. I know this is a lot to take in and all that,  but keeping everything that's happened on the inside isn't really that healthy. It just eats you up and you have to do things to let the real you slip through the cracks sometimes. There's this line in a book called I'll Give You The Sun it goes like this:

'Remake the world.'

Sometimes you have to divide the parts of yourself up just like the characters in that book divide the world up.  There's another line about it in the book. It goes along the lines of:

'the sun, stars, ocean, and all the trees.'

Okay I'll stop getting off topic and go back to giving y'all some awesome advice. Sit back and relax, grab some chocolate and listen loud and crystal clear:

'It's okay to get a bit thrown off balance when someone tells you the famous line 'don't tell anyone' it's a line that makes you feel undervalued as a person. It makes you feel uncomfortable in a way cuz you know that people don't think you can keep what you've learnt from other people. It's okay to feel messed up if people try and define you for what you've done in the past cuz you can't keep a lid on it or something. I'd say sometimes it's good to let go and flip that lid wide open whatever it is. You've shown people you can become an undercover guardian of their secrets so why do they doubt you? It's cuz they don't know what you're capable of and they don't know how  amazing you are as a person.'

It's a crazy thing right? Being a million different versions of the real you. Wrapping yourself up in layers like a chrysalis until you unfurl into the beautiful colourful imperfect version of yourself, until you know how to be the version of yourself that you've happy with. You van still guard the vault even if you hold your head high. 

One last quote I'll leave you to chew on would be:

'fire is catching.. if we burn... you burn with us.'

It's  a rebellious line for sure, but being  a secret-keeper makes a fire burn inside you. Sometimes.

Enjoy.

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